Monday, February 25, 2008

Adoption and Lessons In Compassion


Well I wasn't planning on spilling the beans on my little surprise till China but I had to tell you a special story. We all know my little slide shows are really special for me. When I hear a song that hits me I store it away in my mental slide show file for later. As of last week I hadn't found that perfect song for the day we meet Kaiya. I knew it had to be the perfect song. So while we were on our way to drop off Zoe at school last week I prayed... I know, I know. Maybe you think it's strange to pray about that but I don't. God and I chat about things all day every day. ;0) So I prayed that God would show me the perfect song. I kid you not.... 2 songs later a song came on and I almost started bawling but figured that wasn't smart when driving car pool. We had dropped off Zoe at this point so I asked Kaitlyn if she wanted to listen to it. I rewound the XM radio and she listened really carefully.

When I looked in the review mirror I felt like her eyes were getting more and more full of tears. I thought I must be mistaken. She must be tired or something. After all- there was no way that a four year old could get the link... be deeply touched by music that way right?

When it was over I said, "Baby, your eyes look sad. Are you sleepy?" Kaitlyn said, "No Mommy, it's just that this song makes me think about Kaiya and about Zoe in Guatemala. I think about Zoe when she was in that mudslide and she was alone. It makes me sad. I don't want Kaiya to be alone in China. I am so glad we are going to be her family."

Well that did it. Then I was really crying. I was glad we had arrived at our destination by that point. We sat in the car and listened to the words together. All week I have just kept reflecting on it. Look what God has done.... I had no idea the profound lessons God would teach my children through this journey He has asked us to take.

It is so easy to think that when we make a choice to do something big in our heart it won't reach very far. It's easy to think we can't really make a difference. The truth is we will never know the profound difference we make. We won't realize the way we are changing the course of history. What will our children do because our faith changed their hearts? What will their children do? What will our friends and loved ones do differently because we chose to be unafraid?

Seeing Kaitlyn's heart and compassion for orphans touched me deeply. It is something far beyond anything I could have explained to her.... This precious heart is a gift of God. Something she could only learn by seeing it. I thank the Lord that through these crazy hard lessons not only has He been changing me but He is teaching my little princesses so much more than I could ever have hoped to teach them. This 4 year old gets things that many 40 year olds still try to grasp or ignore all together.

So here is the song.... In a few months, Lord Willing, you will watch me meet my little Kaiya for the first time to this music. The journey to a family through her eyes...
-
"When You Look Me In The Eyes"


-If the heart is always searching,


Can you ever find a home?


I've been looking for that someone,


I can't make it on my own.
-

Dreams can't take the place of loving you,


There's gotta be a million reasons why it's true.
-

When you look me in the eyes,


And tell me that you love me.


Everything's alright,


When you're right here by my side.
-

When you look me in the eyes,


I catch a glimpse of heaven.


I find my paradise,


When you look me in the eyes.
-

How long will I be waiting,


To be with you again


Gonna tell you that I love you,


In the best way that I can.
-
I can't take a day without you here,


You're the light that makes


my darkness disappear.
-

When you look me in the eyes,


And tell me that you love me.


Everything's alright,


When you're right here by my side.
-

When you look me in the eyes,


I catch a glimpse of heaven.


I find my paradise,


When you look me in the eyes.
-

More and more, I start to realize,


I can reach my tomorrow,


I can hold my head up high,


And it's all because you're by my side.
-
When you look me in the eyes,


And tell me that you love me.


Everything's alright,


When you're right here by my side.
-

When I hold you in my arms,


I know that it's forever.


I just gotta let you know,


I never wanna let you go.
-


When you look me in the eyes.


And tell me that you love me.


Everything's alright,


When you're right here by my side.
-
When you look me in the eyes,


I catch a glimpse of heaven.


I find my paradise,


When you look me in the eyes.

When you watch the video try to ignore all the screaming teeny bopper girls. ;0) They won't be in my video.





Don't underestimate yourself and the impact you make. Keep walking the path you know you should be on. Your children see it. Their hearts take it in. Hugs, Angel

13 comments:

TNKerry said...

I love the song, but I especially love knowing how your daughter gets it and that she gets it because of the example you are setting. It scares me sometimes to think of the responsibility I have to my children to guide them into being the best they can be with caring hearts and loving minds. Too many 40 year olds don't get it and I don't want my babies to be them one day. What a sweet heart your little Kaitlyn has already!!!

Anonymous said...

Love Love...this is all Love...Love Mia Momma

Wendy said...

You all amaze me. I have no words....

Natalie C. said...

(tears)...wow, what a smart girl you have there...i love the song, it's perfect.

Dimple Queen said...

I have tears too....beautiful song, and KK's heart broke mine with happiness! She is precious, and so very compassionate!

Angel, thank you for sharing all you do!

Tracey said...

Trying to type through cloudy eyes! That little girl of yours is so wise beyond her years and has a heart of gold. I hope that this world of negativity never brings her down and that she always carries with her the compassion and love for others! Adults could learn from this little one. You've done good mom:)

krista said...

Beautiful.
Such a sweet girl.
Who sings that song?
What a blessing...and, you have impacted my life although we have never met !
Thank you for sharing. Krista

rdhdprincess said...

That is so sweet, and what a beautiful song. I am happy for you! And I don't think it's all all strange to pray about things like that. I do it all the time. Anyways, I know the wait it hard, hang in there! Best wishes, Carrie

melissa said...

Angel, you are so special and you are raising wonderful children.

Not only are you an example to your children, but to those of us who read your blog as well.

Anonymous said...

Can you tell us why your parents named you Angel, please? It seems there must be a wonderful story behind such a special name.

You did it again with your post. Amazing. Made me go and hug my son :)

Thanks. Trish

GDS said...

Wow, very cool stuff. Heart wrenching and beautiful at the same time. Thanks for sharing that.

Wendi said...

That KK is somethin' else - a remarkable somethin'!

What wonderful lyrics...can't wait to see what your creative mind pulls together...whatever it is, I'll be full of 'happy tears' with you.

Tessa said...

Hi Angel,

I found your blog through Heather Duckworth's Faithful Froggers - and I have been checking in periodically. Your heart is amazing! When I read this post a few weeks ago, I could immediately identify with it - because I also love to make slideshows and I do the same thing ... I hear a song and I immediately think about a slideshow I could make ... or I have a slideshow in mind and I try to find a song to fit. So, I just had to say Hooray for you for finding the song ... and I think it is a perfect fit!